This is a place of ME. This is a place where I will let the walls down and be honest. Joys and stories or tears and heartbreaks, they will all be here. Devotionals to poems, my heart is open to you. I will love well. I will love you and honer you by allowing you into my brokenness and the truth that God has reviled to me. This is a place of Me. Continue if you dare ;)

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Depressed

Everything is so dark,
So hopeless.
A cloud over head.
Every time the sun starts to shine,
The clouds close up and it pours.

Swimming in jello.
Not dead,
Not alive.

Tears come way to much,
Curled in a fetal position.
Trembling with fear,
Trying to sleep it away.
Moving like a snail,
No energy.

Rocks in the throat,
Forcing another breath.
Slowly fading like the sun,
Disappearing like sugar in water.

Black is good,
Black is safe.
Crying tears of blood,
Head spinning.

Bed is the best place,
No need to pretend.
Quick sand pulling,
Starting to drown.
Crying for help,

NOTHING.

18 comments:

Kiki said...

that is about how i feel right now with life closing in on every side and i not able to push back.

♥Sarah♥ said...

We're all in this together. I love you girl.

Kiki said...

thanks. I am so tired and sick of fighting this life i am stuck in.

Hannah said...

WEll jsut hold on it is bound to get better. We can be ere for eacother :)

Kiki said...

thanks. hey you should share your profile hannah! i want to see it! i am so glad i have friends to help me throught this hole i am in!

♥Sarah♥ said...

haha ya that was my bad hannah was sined into gmail so i posted as her with out knowing! lol so ya that was me! opps ;)

Kiki said...

HOW?
she should share her profile though!

♥Sarah♥ said...

she doesn't even have a blog!! lol yu don't have to have a blog to post :)

Kiki said...

i know that! what do you take me as an idiot? LOL! it is just that blogger says she has one but is not sharing it! so! i thought she had one!

♥Sarah♥ said...

lol wow you make me laugh!! I lvoe you!

Kiki said...

okay. i am glad that i can be commic releif for someone. is lvoe a new word? JK!!! lol!!! i love you too!

JON said...

Girls! You sound so emo and depressed :(

♥Sarah♥ said...

haha well gee thanks :P

Kiki said...

if only you knew my life jon!

Kiki said...

i lead a double life. only Sarah and Shawn were supposed to know! *huff**huff again* ooh well. how did you figure me out jon? well now that the world knows they should all know that i often mask my feelings and to never believe me when i say something that it is obvious that i do not mean. get it? okay if you ask how i am doing and i say that i am fine, but look like i just had an anvil dropped on my head, do you think you should believe me?
oh nevermind!

lol! since now i cannot have my double life, i guess i should admit something. huh? Sarah i am stupid. i allowed myself to like a guy that is from Australia, i have only known him since sunday. i am SO stupid. oh by the way, world, this is not to be shared. that was hard sharing something from my other life to outsiders. oh well.

Kiki said...

another thing Sarah. i think you should find a new friend because i do not think that i am to terribly fond of this jon guy. you know. i mean he found out about my double life!! i mean common'. lol!!!!!!!! JK!!!!!!!!!!

♥Sarah♥ said...

Golly girl!!! but I know just what you mean... I pretty much always say I'm ok...even tho most of the time it's not true. Isn't that stupid? Well you can always tell me if soemthing is wrong I hope you know that :)

ANd dear!!! it's ok to like this guy!!! lol but just keep it realistic.... and don't woriy not many people read my blog... lol

as to jon... idk I think you can trust him... for the most part... lol ya know he doesn't check this enough to even know we are tlaking about him... kinda funny! lol

Kiki said...

gee thanks! i know i can very rarely tell someone what i am feeling! shawn is one of them!

Sarah, i have only known him for like 4 days! i am knida mad about that ya know! i was liking a perfectly fine guy! argh! feelings!!!!!!!

when i said world i meant outsiders. *scared voice* i mean now that outsiders know who i really am i mean, it is knida scary!!!!!!!! *tear* *scared again* lol!

okay but this jon guy is pretty good if he can see my double life. so when you do read this jon, i am pretty impressed! lol! i am still knida mad at you though for exposing me to the rst of the world. so when you do read this i am mad and amazed at the same time. and i AM telling the truth this time!!

Sarah you should go on to the book review blog!!!

i am sad right now!