This is a place of ME. This is a place where I will let the walls down and be honest. Joys and stories or tears and heartbreaks, they will all be here. Devotionals to poems, my heart is open to you. I will love well. I will love you and honor you by allowing you into my brokenness and the truth that God has reviled to me. This is a place of Me.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010


First off... I passed both the piratical and the written for my cosmetology license! Praise the LORD! Just had to say that :)

So the past few weeks a lot has changed...

1. My ex started dating someone else... LONG story and it's been like 6 months but it hasn't been easy. But it's what I needed to move on. I had moved on in many many ways but there was still this string. It's finally cut. I wish them the best.
Through that God has really been working on my heart. I always thought I was a very forgiving person... I still think I am... But not as much as I thought I was. I'm learning what it's like to forgive through the pain and not hold on to the bitterness... But it's been a very good and enlightening lesson :)

2.I don't know what you my dear readers believe about God giving spiritual gifts in today's world... But I believe whole heartedly that we shouldn't limit the amazing almighty God who are we as his creations to limit him to a time. It just doesn't make sense!
God and I have dived a deeper level the past 6 months. I have given him myself completely. Now he is starting to show me things about myself that I couldn't see before.
I've always been the person that people can feel like they can talk to. I know the deep places in people hidden to the rest of the world. I don't know why but people trust me. Even random people I don't know. lol I have found that I really really understand when people are going though pain... I feel the pain with them. Who knew this was a spiritual gift? lol I also randomly get REALLY worried or depressed for no reason...
Example: The other day I was driving away from work and I got panicked that I or someone else was going to get in a car accident... I thought it was just me being weird since I've had so many car problems... I prayed anyways. I prayed for protection and for no one to die if something did happen... I felt better and drove on home. About an hour later my friend Aiden called... He had been in a accident. At the same time I got scared and started praying. His new car was totaled and it's a miracle that he's alive. I was praying for him without knowing it. Wow.
I'm sure I'll blog more about this later... God and I are still figuring this out.

3. I now have a car. It's beautiful. God knew just what I wanted. I have missed the freedom of my own car.

4. I've been talking to this great guy... You can credit him for my new amazing blog design :) He loves God and people and is BRILLIANT AND CREATIVE... lucky him. lol He loves Converse and poetry. Just all around amazing guy :) His friendship has shown me that I've let my standards for guys slip... a lot. And that there's something better out there. Not going to forget that again.

5. I. Today. Have. My. Cosmetology. License!!!!!!!
So now I have to figure out what I want to do and start paying off some debt! lol I'm ready for anything God sends my way!

There are many other things changing in life... but for now this is what I'll share for now :) Prayers are always welcomed! I love you all and I'm praying for you my friends... I miss you guys!

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Judging A Book

MY life is often jumping around. Putting me in the path of people from every place and walk in life.

The biggest extremes I've seen...

1. People who others will put on a pedistool, hold up as something great because of looks or money or life style, the ones everyone envys.

2. People who others look down on, because of tattoos or piercings or lack of money or life style, the ones others ovoid.

I've been around people from both groups quite a bit in the past few weeks.

In the Beauty industry you find a lot of people from the first category. Guess what?!? I can't stand them! They are selfish snobs who only see themselves. Why does our culture hold this life style so high up? Not only the secular culture but Christians too. Yes I know they need God's love too... but I kinda think God didn't build me for that job as much as others.

I met a guy at church last week. He's working on getting both sleeves tattooed, ears and lip pierced, and all around someone that most people would try to put in the second category. This guy is 23 and has his own business, an apartment, works hard, and most of all has a relationship with God. He's been trough hell and back but continues to rise above it and become the man God wants him to be. Yet, our culture ESPECIALLY Christians judge on what they see.

They say it take about 5 seconds to create your oppion of someone. So we look at the beautiful blonde with the nice car and right away think that she is a good person because she looks like she has it all together. Then we look at the crazy tatted guy and decide that he isn't a good guy because he's different from the culture's standard.

So my challage to you today is to take a little longer than 5 seconds to "have someone all figured out". Look at their heart. Wouldn't you want someone to do the same for you? Let's take after the heart of God and take a little extra time on the figuring people out thing. Deal?

1 Samuel 16:7 (NLT)
But the Lord said to Samuel, “Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”