This is a place of ME. This is a place where I will let the walls down and be honest. Joys and stories or tears and heartbreaks, they will all be here. Devotionals to poems, my heart is open to you. I will love well. I will love you and honor you by allowing you into my brokenness and the truth that God has reviled to me. This is a place of Me.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Almost Freedom

I'm at a place in my life once again where I feel like I'm drowning.... trying to hold my breth a little longer just until I can push to the top and break the water.... I can finally see the sun shining through... ALMOST THERE.

I will graduate Beauty school early Aug. It's been a year of testing my faith and my sanity. Also, a year of seeing what I'm made of and how I can effect people and stretch my creativity skills. can't wait to be done... ALMOST

I'm stuck under a crap load of debt from school... And just getting ready to be able to start paying it off and get on my feet. ALMOST

I'm single and am living my own life... the way I want to... It's amazing... though I still don't fully know what I want my life to look like. Time will tell. Only God knows. He'll let me in on it some day. ALMOST

I'm stepping out of my comfort zone and when I'm invited somewhere I go. I'm for the first time in my life acutally CHOOSING MY OWN FRIENDS! Spending time with people that can support and love me and have fun.... just as I am... aka there's no need to party or talk a certen way or act any way... I can just be me around these people... even talk about my faith and struggles! I thought I was the only one left... Thank God I'm learning I'm not. ALMOST

I'm trying to understand God's grace and unconditional love. No matter what, no matter where, no matter when, no matter why... He's still there waiting for us. Loving us the same as always ready to forgive us 70 times 7 (witch in bible times was the number for infinity). I'm trying to wrap my mind around this... It's not easy. but. ALMOST

I'm learning to rely on God and know his plan is always best he longs to give us the best... even if it doesn't seem like it at the time... sometines we have to go to boot camp first. We have to loose all control and let God have the mucles in the relationship. Let him do it thing and by golly we need to listen! Trying to open my ears. ALMOST

I'm learning the value of family... I would be so so lost with out them. It's the closest thing to unconditional love of God that I have seen. Where I would be with my family is so so lost... I'm starting to see this now. ALMOST

I look into the light shining in the water... trying to make that last push... relizing I can't do it alone. Suddenly i see many hands and at the lead is my Lord and Savior reaching down pulling me out!

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