This is a place of ME. This is a place where I will let the walls down and be honest. Joys and stories or tears and heartbreaks, they will all be here. Devotionals to poems, my heart is open to you. I will love well. I will love you and honer you by allowing you into my brokenness and the truth that God has reviled to me. This is a place of Me. Continue if you dare ;)

Thursday, August 21, 2008


So around this time last year I posted that my life flashed before my eyes.... and guess what it happened again!

I was going to chemistry (and I'm allllll done now! yay! ) and as i pulled up these three dogs were around my car like wating for me to get out...

now first I have always had nightmares about dogs chasing me... part of the reason I'm up this late...I don't want to sleep. lol

so I'm sitting there thinking maybe I shouldn't get out of the car... but then I'm like "your so being stupid sarah!" so I got out of the car and got my books and everything then started to SLOWLY walk across the street to my teachers house... and they kinda start barking and growling a little... so I kinda started to talk nicely to them (like that would help) and kept walking slowly... then one of them took a step twards me and so I started to back up... then they charged me! so I throw my books at the one nearest me ( I think he was like the leader or something) and hit him in the face and ran behind my car but I had already locked it! so I kept running (and screeming... that was kinda funny) twards the house.... and these dogs were like right on my heals... like biting my pants... they didn't get me though... so I'm running like a crazy woman and my teacher comes out... like 6 months pregnet and starts like charging them with a bat...and I run inside. lol so I'm alive! and the animal control people came I'm pretty sure cuz the neighber (who saw) and my teacher had called them.

So ya I was thinking two things.... 1. here goes my senior gymnastics season... I can't tumble without a calf mucle! and 2. I can't work if I can't walk!
so ya... if you look I think you can relate my teacher to God... and me to... well me... honestly God might just have told me that he is fighting for me because I'm done... even though I can't feel or see him... he is fighting for ME. wow.

So I was reading back on my other blog and that last poem I posted (smile) this was a coment that was left by one of my bestest friends Jen,,,, I think it fits here too...

I wish I could understand your pain better... I wish I could tell you what God's up to with your life... I wish that I could take away the ache in your heart...

You've gotta be tired - you're a warrior of the heavens. The battle's been raging, the scars adding up. I know the sword feels heavy, but God WILL help you lift it once more. Keep on fighting, warrior princess. Keep on fighting - don't let this overcome you. He will give you rest... He will reveal His plan, and it will all make sense... but He works in ways we don't understand - His ways are not our ways.

It IS okay to be angry with God. He wants your honesty. It's okay to tell Him it's about ****** time to show up. Really, it is... if that's what you're feeling. If you start telling Him, He can start working with you.

I don't know if any of this helps... I don't know if anything will right now... keep your head up, Lizzy... you don't have to be strong... HE IS! Rest in the arms of your Abba Father.

I love you.


Amber said...

Wow. Well Sarah, you must've smelt really good or something! ;D

Jennie could not have put it more perfectly. We all back up her encouragement. You know, I read the entire Chronicles of Narnia series for the first time a couple weeks ago, and this reminds me of the parts where the characters wonder what Aslan's plan for them is, but he only reveals it in perfect time for them to hear it, and WHY everything happened that did. Then, they ask what would have happened otherwise, or to someone else, and his only answers are: that he only answers what was, not would be, and he only reveals to them their own story, no one else's. This happens to a few characters, so that reminds me that we all go through very similar times, just uniquely altered, if that makes sense. We all struggle, but we all will make it to the end of each struggle.

He'll make sure of that.

*~*~*Gothic*~*~* said...

Sarah I'm So glad your okay!
Truely I look at every sercumstance as a test.
God uses our biggest fears as tests all the time!
Just look at what He might be trying to tell you through all this....
I LUV you tons!
And your always in my prayers =)

Morgan said...

sarah i <3 u and i would be so depressed if u were mauled by demon-possessed doggies! (so don't!) xP

Phoebe said...

I'm so glad that you didn't get bitten. If it were me, I would have stayed in the car until they left or chased them around in the car or something, but definitely not get out.

I'm praying for you and I would just like to remind you of a verse that has encouraged me greatly:

Jeremiah 29:11-13 (or is it 14? idk) I know, you have probably had it preached to you before, but when you are feeling like "Whats the purpose of life? Why should I continue on? this is an excellent verse to remind you of God's promises. I love you SO much, and I'm praying for you.